April 06th, 20194/6/2019 "Suzy, 12/11/1935"This is a belated post from a session in January.
This session was less effective than the previous one, but it definitely still had an effect. The first thing I noticed was a falling sensation like falling out of a chair tilted back except that the bed I was lying on felt tilted back. This sensation lasted quite a while. Periodically throughout most of my session, I'd hear, “Suzy, 12/11/1935” coming behind the curtain separating my bed and the one next to mine. I thought about what a long time ago 1935 was, and this got me thinking about times in our lives. I wondered what Suzy's birth looked like on that day that happened so long ago and thought about how much the world has changed since then. I thought about my own past life and how I wish I could revisit some scenes from it and make different decisions, but time is unidirectional. I even thought about time in general. We don't understand what it is. Physicists have found themselves stumped, and philosophers have helpfully pointed out to them they'd been using time to describe itself. As as a little kid, I found myself perplexed by how time could or couldn't have a beginning. My mom was puzzled when I asked her, “What's the first day?”, not realizing I meant, “What was the first day ever?” I then saw myself looking down on Earth throughout the ages and felt like the master of all I surveyed as I saw things coming together on increasingly small scale in fractal-type manner. First star dust clumped together to from Earth. Then Earth's volcanoes spewing lava and such. Eventually, things settled down enough for molecules to form the first life forms. Then self-aware animals competed with each other until some species developed empathy, leading to social species working as groups. Then humans engaged in inter-tribal warfare. Some of them would leave the Stone Age, and they would carry on fighting in the Bronze Age, forming the first civilizations, then the first city-states, and then the first nations. Then I'd see the pattern repeat with business mergers leading to large corporations having monopolies in their respective fields. Finally, throughout my session, I wished there were a way to record my thoughts directly since I knew I'd forget quite a bit before since there is always some delay between my session and my writing of it. Yes-- some interesting details from this session and all the other interesting ones will be lost forever because of that. Aldous Huxley apparently didn't have this problem, though, since he mentions in The Doors of Perception a psychiatrist there to record his thoughts. That may be due to difference between ketamine and mescaline, though. Comments are closed.
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